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    Nineteenth century navigation jokes
    From: Frank Reed
    Date: 2014 Feb 16, 13:29 -0800

    Some humor c.1871 (before the invention of actual humor)...

    An examiner is posing questions regarding navigation. The subject of the examination answers as literally as possible, and presumably if this had gone on much longer, the barometer joke would have been invented.

    Q: What is the difference between middle latitude and plane sailing?
    A: In one you often see ships, and in the other you ship seas.

    Q: What is a quadrant, how is it used, and how adjusted?
    A: A quadrant is a three-cornered instrument, which is brought on deck when the sun is over the fore-yard, and is generally adjusted with a rusty jack-knife. It is used for measuring altitudes; as the masthead, etc.

    Q: If the quadrant is used without being properly adjusted, what would be the consequence?
    A: If near land, no harm would ensue; and if at sea, the ship would still float.

    Q: In working up latitude, how many corrections do you make?
    A: One for every mistake.

    Q: How do you obtain longitude by chronometer?
    A: The captain takes the sun, and when he stamps on the deck, the steward or cabin-boy notes the time.

    Q: How is a log-line made, and what is its use?
    A: Made of small rope or line; it is used to keep the watch awake, and to make their hands tough.

    Q: What is the difference between paddle and screw steamers?
    A: Screw pays, and paddle doesn't.

    Ha ha.


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